What is a Gentleman?

I found this beautiful definition of being a true gentleman from a YouTube video featuring Ayushmann Khurrana. This is my translation of its Hindi transcript. To see the original video, click here!

There is a stereotype for men – they’re hyped to be macho, to be the bread earner in the family, the saviour of woman, but a man should NEVER cry or be weak in any way.

Doesn’t sound right to me.

I never wanted to be the hero or the saviour or the superman.
I want to be the man who can cry, or sing, or save someone if I can.

I know the ads have told you to play it too “cool”, and fathers asked you to be so disciplined like you’re always in school.

They said, be a gentleman. They also said, being gentle is bad for a man, because you have to save the “honor”,
because you have to put on a magical perfume that makes girls die for you!
why should they die?
The women shouldn’t die.
When I am standing nearby, they shouldn’t be scared.

A man can like anything between pink and Pink Floyd.
If it’s too dark, he too can feel scared.
Because violence has happened to him too! Patriarchy has touched him the wrong way.

He may be under the pressure of growing up too fast, but his heart is still just 300 grams.

Society forces an iron cover on him. Don’t restrict him to just toys of cars and guns when he’s a kid.

May be he’s a bad driver or bad with machines, that’s fine because the only condition of being a man is being real.

I too take care of kids sometimes. I too make her some ginger tea when she comes home tired.

That is why I tell my sons – you don’t have to open the car door for her or bring the chair for her, just be the FIRST to speak up when you see something wrong.

Because having a six-pack doesn’t make you a man. Neither does heavy income, or shouting, or hiding tears.

If someone else feels cold, his heart feels warm for that person.

A man is he who feels the pain of others.


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